Love is What You Make of It
by GraphiteHeron
Summary: Just a little peek into the socalled romances of our favorite ninja. Sometimes love isn't fluffy, but it sure is funny.
1. Love hurts

**Love is What You Make of It**

Uchiha Sasuke & Haruno Sakura

**Author's Note: Heron got struck by the random inspiration to write anti-romantic romance, if that makes sense. The pairings are simply the ones Heron has found herself enamored to, mostly Sasuke and Sakura, Neji and Tenten, Shikamaru and Ino, and Naruto and Hinata. This collection of meanderings comprises how Heron believes these relationships would work…which means while they're meant to put a smile on your face, they might not necessarily be fluffy. First up, Sasuke and Sakura. What happens when a missing-nin falls for a medic-nin. **

"Excuse me?" the pink-haired medic demanded, her sharp jade eyes flaring. Sasuke sighed. It was a simple question, wasn't it? A yes or no answer would suffice. Never once did the 'genius' Uchiha figure it might not be that simple.

"I _said_, will you marry me?" he repeated, dark eyes narrowing in frustration. Only then did he stop to think about her tone of voice. _'Oh shit.'_

Her fist connected with his face as she shrieked, "_Marry_ you? After all you've done to me," another punch, which coupled with her considerable strength was no laughing matter, "to Konoha," another hit, "to my friends," a crippling kick to his side that fractured at least one rib and probably broke one of his kidneys, "you ask me to _marry _you?! You insensitive," one of his cheek bones shattered, "idiotic," now he was pretty sure it was his nose crunching beneath her might, "_asshole_."

Spitting out a tooth, Sasuke attempted to drag himself to his feet, but the pain forced him down again. And he'd thought he'd suffered at the hands of Itachi and Orochimaru. They had nothing on the woman he'd come to love. His forearm was broken in at least three places where he'd blocked one of her hits. "That's a no?" he wheezed, blood dripping steadily from his mouth and nose.

Sakura cocked her head to one side and asked quietly, "Who said I said no?"


	2. Eagles don't say

**Love is What You Make of It**

Hyuga Neji and Tenten

**Author's Note: Yes, chapters are hideously short. The plot bunnies wouldn't let Heron write any longer and be able to end it gracefully. These are just meant to make you laugh a little, and maybe plant some ideas out there for longer romance fictions. Or anti-romance, if you want to call it that. Two chapters in less than half an hour is unusual, but hey, Heron's just out to have a little fun. Here next we have a Neji/Ten set sometime in the future. They're already married, and their firstborn daughter is asking questions. Bring on the awkwardness! **

"Mama?" the little girl asked plaintively. Tenten should have taken her daughter's tone of voice as a warning first off. Yozora was _never _plaintive. But, comfortably snuggled in bed with her daughter curled into her side as they waited for Yozora's father to come home from his mission, Tenten paid the warning no heed.

"Hmm?" the woman replied, gazing down at the wide, lunar orbs of her daughter. Unlike most children of four, Yozora's eyes held no innocence, no naïveté regarding the evils of the world. Theirs was a shinobi family, and Hyuga at that. Yozora had lost all naïve notions long before the seal ever touched her forehead.

"I heard the other kids' mommies and daddies say 'I love you', and I never heard you and Papa ever say it," Yozora pointed out, her speech holding no childish affectations other than the references to the other parents. "Do you and Papa ever say it?"

Tenten gulped. No, no, her relationship with Neji had actually never included the time-worn little phrase. Tenten herself had deemed it unnecessary, and Neji had followed her lead. Tenten loved Neji dearly, but she never actually said it out loud. Not in their years as teammates, not after their team disbanded but their partnership remained, not in nearly five years of marriage, never had she told Neji she loved him. Now, how to tell their daughter that without scarring her forever?

"Um, no, actually. Your Papa and I don't say it," Tenten answered honestly, her mind racing for a graceful safety net.

"So does that mean you and Papa don't love each other?" Yozora demanded, still using that uncharacteristic plaintive, whiny tone of voice that she oft ridiculed the other children at the academy for using. Apparently she had learned that it was an effective tone to make one's parents spill all the answers to any given question. Currently, it was working.

Inspiration struck Tenten in a flash. Hyuga was a fairly avian clan, right? Taking on a story-teller's voice, Tenten internally squirmed with glee at her quick thinking. "Now, Yozora, your Papa and I love each other very much, but we are like eagles. Eagles stay together for life, but eagles don't say 'I love you' to their partners. They don't have to say it. Eagles just know."

"Eagles also kick their young out of the nest as soon as they _might_ be ready to fly," Yozora pointed out flatly.

Tenten's hand made stinging contact with her own forehead.


End file.
